Clean & Clear Oil Absorbing Sheets

/ grooming
by Steven

Purchase Price: $5.45 for 50 sheets
Purchase Place: Kroger
Rating: 3.5
Pros: Instantly removes excess oil. Won’t smudge makeup. Cool effect.
Cons: Very expensive. Needs more surface area.

Although I’m ashamed to admit it, I have a very oily face. Remember that Simpsons episode where Homer was trying to sell grease, and he went to a fast food clerk then wanted to steal that kid’s face oil for profit? I am that kid.

This product was definitely geared towards the females although I purchased it because I felt my face was extra oily that day. The blue pad instantly turns clear when wiped against oil. I was very amused/impressed within the first swipe. I got curious and tried other liquids such as spit and water which do not work so well. These sheets were designed to absorb oil.

The whole package can fit in your palm and was designed to be portable. I have it in my backpack and whip it out whenever I “feel” oily. I’m comfortable enough with my manhood to use oil absorbing sheets in public, although I’m pretty sure not everybody is willing to also.

I don’t plan on buying this product again since it’s so expensive. They do exactly what they claim but the price is equivalent to five bean burritos at Taco Bell. I found an alternative to these oil absorbing sheets although they are not as awesome. It’s called toilet paper.

McDonald’s Southern Style Chicken Sandwich

/ fast food
by Steven

Purchase Price: $2.73
Purchase Place: McDonald’s
Rating: 2.0
Pros: Real chicken.
Cons: Plain bread. Plain chicken. Plain pickles. It’s a blatant rip-off from the Chik-fil-a sandwhich.

The Southern Style Chicken Sandwich was released in July, 2006. I just noticed it the other day. This just shows you how much I really pay attention to McDonald’s…although I bought a Big Mac from the same place last week.

From my gym, there is a McDonald’s, school Chik-fil-A and Burger King. I usually make a stop after the gym. The Chik-fil-A chicken sandwich is $2.75 and made from the chicken god himself. The amount of butter is usually just right and the chicken is especially juicy. The McDonald’s Southern Style Chicken Sandwich is a blatant rip-off that is 0.02 cents cheaper than the Chik-fil-A sandwich here.

The pictures advertised are misleading. The chicken is not bigger than the bun and kind of dry, but it had a nice shape(oval). Everything about this sandwich is just spectacularly plain. I’m almost ashamed I paid more than $2.00 for such an inferior sandwich.

Enviga Green Tea

/ drinks
by Steven

Purchase Price: $6.39 for 6
Purchase Place: Kroger
Rating: 4.5
Pros: Great light taste. Burns calories? No sugar crash.
Cons: Where are the vitamins? Might not burn that much calories.

Most energy drinks provide a strong energy boost and a light crash afterwards for me. Enviga provides good energy and no sugar crash. Maybe it is due to Enviga’s lack of sugar.

Enviga’s nutritional value is very appealing with only 5 calories, no sugar, and even 20% daily value of calcium. Enviga is advertised as a calorie burner. It claims to burn 60-100 calories per day with every three cans. I can’t say this is true due to not having the right materials to due extensive research. Drinking three cans a day seems excessive and people looking to lose weight should try exercising instead.

The diet/aspartame taste is apparent but it is overshadowed by the green tea flavor although the green tea flavor is not overwhelmingly strong. I enjoy this carbonated beverage more than other energy drinks because it’s not super sweet and there is no aftertaste. I have tried the peach and berry flavors and they are disappointing. These flavors taste too artificial.

Enviga is also cheaper at $1.29 instead of $1.99 for a regular energy drink. I believe I have found my favorite “energy” drink.

iRhythms A-211

/ electronics
by Steven

Purchase Price: retails ~$175 but I got it for free.
Purchase Place: Stolen
Rating: 2.0
Pros: Decent bass. Cool touch controls for volume.
Cons: Must use remote to turn on speakers. Volume down button sucks.

Cyber Acoustics is a great company for speakers but their iRhythms line is not that impressive. I upgraded from a CA-5001. It was a decent upgrade since my two of my CA-5001 speakers were not working so technically, it was a 3.1 system.

I usually check reviews and opinions on big purchases (over $9) but since my dad won this at a company lottery, I got a free 2.1 system. The subwoofer is decent but the price is way too high for something designed specifically with the iPod. Since I do not have a iPod, the control dock in front of me is completely useless.

iRhythms A-211 comes with a tiny remote that is mandatory to turn on the speakers unless you want to reach behind the subwoofer which I am way too lazy to do. The dock allows volume control but my volume down button is not as sensitive as the volume up button, which is irritating. I looked on the net and this seems to be a common problem.

The remote seems to have a range of eight inches and presents a short but annoying lag time to the speakers. The treble and bass knobs are at the back of the subwoofer and I can’t reach them unless I crawl under my desk. It would’ve have been nice to have all the controls on the remote and a speaker.

I’m not a huge audiophile but from what I’ve read, the sound is decent but way too expensive. I would recommend the CA-5001(which retails for $80) over the iRhythms A-211. It is cheaper and you get 5.1 with an easy access power button.

Goldfish Flavor Blasted Blazin’ Buffalo Wing

/ snacks
by Steven

Purchase Price: $1.79 for 6.6oz
Purchase Place: Kroger
Rating: 1.0
Pros: Smells like buffalo wings. Crossword puzzle!
Cons: Too weird. Unhealthy. Disgusting taste.

I am going to go ahead and admit that I’m not a goldfish fan. I like baked snacks because they tend to be healthier. I like fish because they don’t talk back when I tell them about my excruciating days at the office. Mixed together; I’ve never really been much of a fan. It’s because cheddar killed my family.

Blazin’ Buffalo Wing caught my eye because I’m a huge wing fan. I ate wings nearly every day last semester. I had to try the Goldfish version and it was one of the biggest mistakes since the time I used aluminum foil and a rubber band as a condom.

Upon opening the package, the familiar flavor of hot wings hit my nostrils. The snack tasted like a hot wing but instead of chicken, it has been replaced by a really salty cracker. The cracker is a little bit spicy but mild enough to be enjoyed by a four-year-old that’s if they don’t throw the bag away after the first bite.

 

This snack overall is equivalent to normal baked chips in terms of health. I recommend the plain Goldfish Cheddar over any other crazy flavors available, and that’s only if you are a fan of cheddar. If the plain Goldfish received a rating of 4.0, then this would be a 1.0 max.